bamboo chronicles Part I

Living with an American husband in my own country has been a hilarious treat for me. The gap between the first world and the third is indeed oceans apart. With my dear husband's permission, i therefore publish the bamboo chronicles.

PIGGY TALK

Charlie:I saw the funniest thing today, shals. I was riding along carmen market and i saw the biggest pig you ever saw being made to ride a motorela! There were like two guys pushing it on to this thing and i swear to God that is the funniest thing ever. It was a big momma pig, man! I wonder how much the pig has to pay...

After a while...

Charlie: Then I saw this old lady with a purse and she was walking along with a pig on a leash! Isn't it funny how you guys let your dogs bark all night and refuse to put them on a leash? You have no problem putting pigs on 'em!

Shal (no comment)

Charlie: Well, I guess you would put dogs on a leash if you eat them too.

Charlie: The pigs in the United States have their own cars. It's a rich country."

SCHOOL LIFE

Shal:Are you older than your teacher?

Charlie: O yeah! I am older than everybody else. Older than the principal. Older than anybody. You have to get two and a half people to get my age.

Charlie: How come you're not in school today, Shals?

Shal: It's a national holiday. I forgot which.

Charlie: Oh I know. It's National Flip-flop Day!

TRANSPORTATION

"Do I look like a sardine to you?"

"If it wasnt for multi cabs some people wouldnt experience any touch at all."

TALKS

Shal: I have to make you your own blog. I'll call it Bamboo Chronicles for the sake of posterity.

Charlie: Prosperity.

Shal: No, hon. Its posterity.

Charlie: Oh, is that like, posture?

AT THE POOL.

Shal: How come you can swim underwater?

Charlie:I dont know. I dont think when I swim so I can't talk about it. I can't talk about something I haven't thought of. I have to think so I can talk.

SPLASH!

Shal: How did you do it?

Charlie: Oh, you just follow your head.

BIG GRIN.

ON LIFE AND LOVE

Charlie: You are always good at what you love.

RELIGION

Charlie:Where does the word heaven and hell come from?

Shal: Do i look like an encyclopedia to you????

After watching angels and demons, Charlie casually told me he was one of the thousands in st. peter's square during the Pope's election but that he had no idea what it was all about. I exclaimed in amazement, "That is like one of the most important event in our history??! He looked at me, puzzled. "Why, because he went out of the window?"

(man, there is something definitely wrong with our conversation.)

After resolving that it wasn't actually the Pope's election, I asked him who the pope was. " I don't know. He was this very old guy. It took him one whole day just to walk out to that tiny window."

SILLY STUFF

Shal: Why do u call the zipper a Fly?"

Charlie: Coz when girls pull it down, we fly."

FACEBOOK

Shal: CAn I use the computer? Remember I told you last night I have to do college work overtime tonight?

Charlie: Yeah Im sorry I forgot. You can use it now.

Shal: Thanks. (Opens google Chrome. Clicks on Facebook. Saw 2 Farm Town Requests. Clicks. Accept. Accept.

Charlie: Shals, those are chickens and cows. Are those your college work?

Shal: (speechless)

Charlie: That's interesting...