for you who has arrived

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you simply, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way of loving

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that when I fall asleep, it is your eyes that close.

i found this poem again in one of my archives. i remembered this from the movie patch adams. did you watch that movie? falling in love seems so different now. as i get older, things that are important before seem silly now.

am i really falling in love? somehow the question needs to be answered by the heart rather than the mind. yet it remains a valid question that needs to be asked and thought of. love is not mere feeling. loves moves from faith and trust. faith that the hand of the divine moves fate that allows us to meet. trust that in spite of our differences we believe in each other's goodness and that we know instinctively that we want what is best for the other.

what does the future bring? i do not know. i just know that it is good that you are here. it is a blessing that you care somehow. and that i am happy.

i love you, silly. hahaha!

fun de PoGon

the funniest guys: Anthoy Walter Vega (3 Gonzalez08) and Rodimer Lomoya (3 Pongracz07)

gad. they do make me laugh. and it somehow makes the ache go away a little. i wish all people have a moyax and a vega in their lives. they have that wonderful gift of making you realize that life is one big comedy and that the lord god meant for us to laugh amidst the saddest things. watching and listening to them, one need not go to a comedy bar or to the movies. their antics are original, their jokes natural. they take delight in the simplest, silliest things and somehow turn them into a big comedy show. they do not even try to make you laugh.

i am blessed to have them. but what you're actually seeing is only two of the funniest little big guys i have! imagine the power of a roomful of hyperactive 15 year-olds. gad. all the world's worries turn to smoke.