Everyday i find a reason to live. That is, if i decide to. The past year seemed to flash before my eyes in a colorful whirl. Most of the time i was sad. The sadness that never went away. The sadness that one feels over and over again no matter how happy the moment is. It lurks there. Like a would-be pimple. ha ha.
Though sad, i cannot help but be grateful. Life has given me so much and i know that some of the sources of my angst are for want of things that i do not need or cannot have. Like a typical grown-up.
Imagine life as an adventure. I do not mean to be simplistic or to be overly optimistic. But many times this is what i cling to. Because there are times when life becomes a chore and i wish it to end: stop the routine, stop this mere existence. Yet someone, somehow insists that i live, to embrak once more in another adventure. Where the outcome is not the most important thing but the fight, the magic of being alive.
I know that this awfully big adventure will soon end. Still, its awfully good to be alive. *sigh*
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